It’s Wednesday, but if you are like me and the cold/rainy days we’ve been having beckoned you to hit snooze this morning, it feels like a Monday!  Rest assured, you are not alone–I’m raising my fifth cup of coffee to an early bed time tonight!

The list of benefits I can give you in support of a boudoir experience is at least a mile long.  I’ve built my business on the foundational belief that every woman deserves this experience.  And it’s true–no matter what your circumstances are, no matter what you weigh, no matter your age—no matter what excuse you can give me–

BUT. Yep, there is a but. There is one reason why you should not book a shoot. In five years, I’ve had a handful of clients with this as their only motivation, and the experience is just not the same.   Ready?  Okay, I’ll spill the beans….

If you are doing this shoot for him/her and not at least partially for yourself, DO NOT DO IT!  Yes, I think it’s awesome that you are getting married, celebrating an anniversary, it’s his birthday, it’s her Christmas present, etc.  Boudoir portraits make an incredibly special, intimate gift.  But if you can’t look me in the eye and tell me that this is really for yourself first and foremost, find another gift.

Truly babe, your heart has got to be in this one.  Let me explain why this is *crucially* important.

1. Planning–The planning process is way too involved and important to be taken on by a beauty who has zero interest in this experience.  You will put off shopping for outfits/get stressed because you don’t know what they would like the best/not spend enough time dreaming about products or what you’d like out of this experience.  When the planning process isn’t taken on seriously and with an excited heart, the experience just doesn’t hold the same magic.
2. Barrier to Transformation–The reason women love our brand of boudoir experiences is because it gives them a chance to see themselves through another set of eyes–a set that truly is invested in making them feel amazing.  If you are only doing this as a gift, you aren’t coming in with the same desire to experience transformation, and it will make it so much harder for us to connect/for me to reach you.  Because you come in less committed to seeing yourself more kindly, you may not be as elated with your images.  The truth is–I can pose you the same as everyone else, edit the same, give you the same experience, and it will still feel differently if you are only doing this to please someone else.
3. You Won’t Be Ready–emotionally.  Your emotions play a huge role in this experience.  If you are doing this solely for the benefit of someone else, YOU won’t truly be ready for it.  I want to meet you.  I can email, chat on the phone, text, FB message..WHATEVER your preferred method of communication is–and I can rattle off 100 reasons why we should meet.  But I want to meet you when you are ready.  I want to meet you when you walk in the studio and you are so nervous you can barely breathe, but you are excited and prepared to walk through this part of your self-love journey.  I want you to pick outfits that you love, choose heirloom products that you want to treasure forever, pose you to highlight your fave physical features.

You need to know that you don’t need reasons to book this experience.  You are deserving, valuable, and worthy all on your own, right where you are. Do it so that you can look in the mirror and smile. Do it so that you can pour into your tribe with an intentional, available joy.  Do it so that you can finally make peace with yourself.

Don’t do it for him. Don’t do it for her.  Do it for you.